Not content to simply helm a private practice at Easton's Simon Silk Mill, holistic psychotherapist Alissa Vreeland, LPC, was inspired to create a space for community healing, bringing women together to help each other grow. Here's how she did it and why.
We Need Each Other
Research says that the biggest indicator of whether a difficult event becomes lasting trauma is the support we receive in response. “And what makes therapy effective,” Vreeland says, “is the relationship between therapist and client.” As humans, we're biologically hardwired for connection, belonging and community.
“That's why we spend our lives adjusting ourselves to fit in,” Vreeland says, “reading and scanning our environment for signs of desired behavior. The dysfunctional part of this is hyper-independence.”
Hyper-independence is the desire to navigate struggles without asking for help, to appear to have it together and to feel uncomfortable showing our vulnerabilities. It's lonely, stressful and makes everything harder. There has been a growing movement of sharing struggles—once they're over. The pressure is still on to hide un-cute emotions and hardships until we can say we've come out the other side.
Root Collective is Vreeland's effort to provide space to come together and connect more deeply to ourselves and our internal experiences in the presence of others.
The Science of Stress
In Vreeland's private practice, she attracts many Gen Z and Millennial clients who are noticing symptoms like irritability, feelings of disconnection and racing minds—hallmarks of anxiety.
“Stressful lives cause a stress response in our bodies,” Vreeland says. “Our nervous systems become dysregulated, prompting us to operate in survival mode.” We all have different reasons for chronic stress, and two years of a pandemic is certainly one.
“We need to normalize how our bodies and brains respond to a constant flood of stress in our lives. You can only take so much before you see symptoms. It's really normal,” she adds. “Welcome to being human.”
For those suffering, though, it doesn't feel normal. We easily turn on ourselves with an attitude of blame and hyper-independence, in no hurry to reveal what we're going through.
Root Collective
As Vreeland helped her clients nurture themselves out of this type of survival mode, she noticed a shift in focus. “As they moved out of chronic stress and anxiety,” she says, “space freed up.”
We're able to care about and feel curiosity and awareness for so much more when we're no longer just getting through each day. We might realize how disconnected we've felt from ourselves and others, and feel ready to change that.
Seeing how ready these clients were to grow and connect, Vreeland realized she could bring people together to do this work. Root Collective is about sharing yourself and your struggle with others who are in the same arena and can cheer you on. Braving vulnerability and having the validation of others is the antithesis to struggling alone, and vital to being a strong, happy human.
A Venue for Healing
What form does Root Collective take? Vreeland offers five-week group sessions, workshops and has a longer retreat in the works. Root Collective isn't the same as or a replacement for therapy, and it's not appropriate for those in the midst of crisis. Instead, it adds a venue for community healing for those who are ready.
Virtual groups bring women together weekly, joining from anywhere. With Vreeland's facilitation, conversation focuses on identifying and shedding the narratives that have led to hyper-independence. Participants might share moments when showing vulnerability backfired, fueling isolating defenses.
“A lot of people who gravitate towards this are the deep-feeling, intuitive, empathetic people,” Vreeland says. “For them, it's hard to have big feelings in a world where we're still not talking about our feelings. In Root Collective, it's a space with others who get you and where everyone knows that the cool thing is to be yourself.”
Workshops and Retreats
In June, Root Collective held its first workshop, partnering with Skinterest Skincare Boutique, Lavish Haus Design & Event Co. and Easton Yoga to provide a day full of nourishment. Combining yoga, facials and massages, and a potted plant craft with juicy group work, it's a self-care holiday away from it all that will be returning in the fall to bring like-minded ladies together.
“By going into it,” Vreeland notes, “you're self-describing that you care about working on this. You're coming into this with the expectation that there will be openness and vulnerability.” It inspires trust and empathy just to know why you're there!
Our ability to validate, accept and be compassionate toward ourselves and each other is incredibly powerful, and Root Collective seeks to make this fun, real and authentic. A multi-day destination retreat is next on Root Collective's bucket list. Get connected for your next opportunity to grow, together.
joinrootcollective.com | alissavreeland.com
Published as "Ask the Expert" in the July 2022 edition of Lehigh Valley Style magazine.
